I’ve got a story to tell. I’ve mentioned it over the years in my blog, starting out with the series entitled, Terror on the Caregiver.
It is about how I am left feeling betrayed by my siblings and other family members, as I earnestly served as my mother’s sole caregiver, until her ascension. It is a very painful story to tell, even nearly 10 years after the rivalry began.
I often stop, then start writing. That’s because writing the story hurts me. I recently hinted at this back and forth feeling in the post Maybe Is the Theme, dated February 1, 2022. Each time I make substantial progress, I uncover yet another level of emotions, going through transformative experiences, examining myself, and trying to understand how God works each time.
I have these regular spontaneous moments, moments of deep Gratitude. Gratitude hits me deeply in my spirit and it hits me at random. I can never predict when it will happen. It doesn’t matter where I am. And, it has just hit me now, inspiring me to write this post!
“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” – Dr. Seuss “Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,” – Philippians 3:13
Forgiving and forgetting are wise practices to exercise, as we are now in the new year of 2022.
Audio Comments On Forgiving & Forgetting The Past
This year promises to be a year of things moving extremely fast. Master Sri Akarshana refers to 2022 as the Quantum Leap year where everything, for and against our greatest good, will be moving rapidly, in health, wealth, and relationships.
So, we must be aware of the energies that surround us, and we, therefore, have no time to be absorbed into past pains. I say that we must forgive those pains, but remember, not forget, what caused them.
We must especially use lessons we learned from the past in the energy-dynamic environment that 2022 promises to be.
Master Sri Akarshana’s Predictions for 2022, explains that in 2022, things will be sped up and we will react in one of three ways, Quantum Leaping Forward, being the best:
Quantum Leap Backwards
Wait It Out – Hoping Only but doing nothing
Quantum Leaping Forward
Check out his video first, to understand the context in which I offer my reflections on Forgiving and Forgetting.
At the seeming climax of many of my trials, I tend to experience vivid emotions of worry and fear, just like the next person. I am not immune to any human emotions. I have been an emotional animal at times, that an insensitive person couldn’t tolerate.
But, big but, I pride myself in managing human disappointment, pain, grieving, anger, and resentment.
I credit my abilities to manage the things that humans go through to mediation, prayer also. But I do tend to meditate more than I pray. I practice a form of Prayer-Meditation, whereby I put the intention of my prayers in the air by merely thinking about them. And, in so doing, I am praying much the same as speaking them.
I sincerely share this post to proclaim that Inner Peace is the most valuable gift that God has given us.
In Inner Peace lies Acceptance, Surrender, Trust, Belief, and Patience. These virtues are beneficial to the body, mind, and spirit.
Inner Peace was not always accessible to me. At a time when I earned six figures, I stressed my mind and spirit to keep money flowing. That was over 20 years ago before I became a new man. Today, friends and colleagues attempt to entice me to return to ‘the game’, to be it in IT, bitcoin investments, small business adventures, or money-making ideas du jour.
I have no plans to return to that noisy chaotic world again, though. I fear what money and chasing after it would do to the Inner Peace that I now have. I never want to lose this. I have no interest in going viral or monetizing for profit. Over a year ago, I deleted my Facebook, Linked In, and other social media accounts.
I do wish to reach more people but to do so, unfortunately, costs money. So, I reach who I can on my personal but limited budget. But I do, therefore, maintain my Inner Peace.
Achieving Inner Peace in the New World Order, in our new post coronavirus world, is essential. There are many human challenges that can distract us from this gift, and worse can bring out the worse in us.
Many years ago, I recognized the importance of maintaining a peaceful state of mind. That’s likely because my life has always been dynamic, intense, and bursting with passion, since birth, I’ve experienced, and been told.
Over 30 years ago, I began a ‘deep dive’ into my own spirituality. This exploration was a personal one, whereby I sought to establish a relationship between me and God. …A really close one, with no one in between, for no one seemed True. I did not want the layer of religion or the church between us, though.
I respect religion and the church, but I put them in proper perspective, with regard to spirituality. I’ve found that religions and churches often deviate from what should be their main focus, addressing other priorities, such as tiding, fundraising, televangelism, and social media. …popularity, materialism, etc.
They do a get deal of charity ministries as well. It’s not directly their fault, but the sources of their funding, contribute to making poverty and inequity comfortable, instead of working to totally eliminate it, making those that they help self-sufficient.
Generally speaking, they continue such ministries, foundations and governments keep funding their causes, people keep receiving, but their long-term status remains the same.
Though these efforts may be well-intentioned spiritually, they impeded the closeness that I needed to have with the God of my understanding. I seek, still today, enlightenment. Beyond wisdom and faith, I want to be immersed in the spirit of God.
Furthermore, I wanted to shape the image of the God of my understanding. God bestowed me with this free will. I wanted to use this blessing to see God as I wanted to based on my journey, failures, triumphs, and ever-evolving wisdom.
I longed to see the God in me, and in every living creature. I longed to experience a multidimensional sensee of God, not a one-dimensional one.
I remember, in early 2000, when participating in an exercise that Minister Rev. Barry Vennard, of Unity Church, asked participants, in a Unity Church spiritual workshop to do. This exercise still sticks with me today.
Minister Vennard asked all participants to close their eyes and imagine God as they would like him to be. He asked that we imagine how he would be towards us? Would he judge us? How would he treat us when we made mistakes? What would he say about our pain, mistakes, defeats, and victories? How would he encourage us through our trials? …And so on and so forth.
I’ve been terribly busy lately. It seems that my life has gone from zero to 100 with the beginning of the new year. Aspirations have not manifested as I desired. They are unfolding, not as I expected, but I am non-resistant to what God and The Universe guide me to and reveals to me.
I’ve been every-day busy! And my list of projects seems to go nowhere! …While my mind keeps adding new ideas to the list. I have at least five posts and videos in the incubator that I refuse to rush until I have time. But I never seem to have the time and mindset in sync to complete them.
I apologize to guest blogger Brandyce for taking so long to create this post. We have been both busy and have gone back and forth in its conceptualization. She is as busy as I am, and our schedules often were not in sync. I am posting it now to honor my commitment but wish I have more time to do it right.
I invited Brandyce to share a post over a month ago. I invite all of you to share a post. I will share a post or more, likewise.
You see, I’ve given up on the world being saved, Instead, I am creating my own world of like vibration spirits, within The World. You are in my world. I am in yours. Brandyce is a part of the beautiful community that we created that I want to share with you.
This is another one of those deep, heartfelt posts. I hope that you take the time to review it in its entirety. This is real talk. If it is not inviting to you, that is fine too. It is about being gifted. I Am. You can be too, by doing one thing. The gift has already been given to you by The Most High. Accepting it, and God’s desire for your use of this gift transforms you from merely being a gift recipient into being Gifted. I Am Gifted.
I’m gifted, I can now say!
How arrogant, narcissistic, and egotistical you may first say. But I believe that we all have a spiritual gift. God has endowed us all with a spiritual gift that cannot be taken away. It can’t be reversed. It’s in us all. It’s like death. Death is certain. There’s nothing that can reverse it. Our endowed gift from God in within us. Whether we accept it or not, it is still in us.
I know that I’m gifted. My confidence dwells in my willingness to accept the gift that God has given me. Proclaiming this is not based on any superior intentions. Many of us have gifts. We all have gifts that God has given us all. It is our dharma, a purpose, a mission. What makes us gifted, as opposed to just having a gift, is our willingness to acknowledge and accept that gift.
“We all have ability. The difference is how we use it.” – Stevie Wonder
This is a Feel-Good post. I hope that you want to feel better today. I do. We need it. I will try my best with this post.
The vibration in the atmosphere has been tense. I believe that the Lord wants us to have more alone time to reflect and reconcile our differences with The World, to perhaps lead us to reconciliation, inner peace, and Love. I have had to go inward and introspective on a daily to keep my vibe up high.
Today, my vibe is very elevated! I am looking forward to the new life that begins each day. I see sleep as dying each night and waking reborn.
But this moment, the new Season just before us, post-Lobster, post-COVID19, post-insurrection, post-everything 2020 is more eagerly anticipated by everyone. The unknowns and adventure of it all can be absolutely exhilarating, if you are imaginatively creative, and are vibrating higher than most. I am that way today. Are you?
I am looking forward to a more discerned and refined me, blossoming in this new Springtime. For I know that Spring always comes. Always, period point-blank.
We are on its horizon. I listened to Stevie Wonder’s music and watched his videos today, and I feel mighty inspired. I hope you enjoy it. Kevy
I am singing about Tomorrow. Let’s start singing of Love from our hearts.
Stevie Wonder – Ngiculela – Es Una Historia – I am Singing – Apr 18, 2007 – Crustybrown
If ever there was a time to enjoy Solitude, now is that time. Let me give you a few reasons: Truth Decay, Racism, Hate, The Lobster, Riots, COVID19, Uncertainty, etc. This post reveals that I am spending most of my free time alone. …And I am joyous! God is there with me showing me how beautiful I am, and where I may have gone wrong. …Or did I? Was it all for my greater good? Kevy
I was speaking to a friend the other day and I was telling her that I am not sure if I could ever be in a close relationship, live with another person or even engage with my family. She agreed with me for much the same reasons.
I know it sounds a little strange but it’s not at all. I’m in spirit now more than into people. I enjoy Being alone. I have so many rituals that I follow which keeps me at a higher vibration. …Rituals such as grounding on a regular basis, meditation, and prayer daily. I have a lot of health rituals such as juicing, also do mineral baths, with salt and oils. I have a creative side where I’m writing, making videos, as well as putting content out on the blog.
I hope that most people who read my post don’t think that I’m full of rage and anger because I’m not.
I am simply a Black man who has been through a lot of trials, and who’s well-traveled, analytical, educated, and brave enough to speak my mind. I really don’t care if my reality has a dismal aspect. It is simply what I’ve experienced in my life, good, bad, and ugly.
Though many Black people don’t speak their true minds, I do my best to encourage them to speak their minds in response to my opinions, even if they disagree with me. I won’t shun them. Sometimes they do comment on my posts. Sometimes they do so in private. Many despise me because of my views as oppose to discussing why they feel differently. That their “monkey”, not mine. I will explain “The Monkey” in a future post.
But I am only sharing with you how I managed through The Revolution that we’re currently in. …And, through the trials that you may experience.
For one, I manage through practicing daily meditation. I’ve done so for about 30 years. I have posted on meditation, as well as on prayer, which too is a long-time daily practice of mine. I do grounding as well. All these things keep me at a higher vibration in spite of expressing frustrations with the things that I’ve experienced. …The things I experienced today. …The trials in which I’ve endured.
But this post is about music. Music is a big part of my life. I see it as the background theme music of every scene and mood in my daily life. …As if my life is video content. I use music to calibrate my mood and spirit whenever it requires calibration.
It’s been a minute since I’ve posted on Seasons As Our Teacher. Well, it’s been maybe a few weeks.
Well, like everyone else, I experience challenges, disappointments, opportunities, victories, and failures every day. Let’s be real. Look at the Season we’re in! I was telling a good friend the other day that every week of my life could be a movie in itself.
I meet interesting people, encounter interesting situations, and try to always to look at them through a spiritual lens. I find that when I look at people, places, and things through a spiritual lens, it makes it easier to discern.
Think about it, if you look at the person and look at their personality and the details of what they said, what you said, and what you did, it gets all complicated. But when I look at it as spirit, then you’re able to just decide if it’s a spirit that elevates or ignites you, or if it’s a spirit that doesn’t. It’s just that simple.
I can apply the same thing to things such as addictions or cigarettes or eating disorders or whatever, or I can go through all of the analysis paralysis that I used to do. Today, I simply say, Is it a good spirit or bad spirit? It makes life less complicated.
In my return, I decided to return to Poetrimony. It is my go-to. Often when I go to parks, I sit and write poetry or songs.
I started writing poetry actually about 20 years ago and. In my first poem; I can remember it clearly. It was called Upside Down. I was in a lot of pain at this time. My poetry has been very therapeutic for me
I recommend that anyone who writes, actually I recommend that everyone writes, but I highly recommend that you date what you write. Because I did that for about 20 years, and I can think about the things that were going on at the time that I wrote a particular poem or a particular story or narrative simply by looking at the date.
When I wrote this poem Upside Down, I was in pain, but at the same time that I was in pain, I had a lot of blessings before me that I was ignoring. I could have turned that pain upside down. I remember the repeated stanza in that poem was:
I was looking from the upside-down.
I was putting the upside down
Only to realize that in this pain
My life would be turned around.
…The very first poem I wrote. This was back in the year 2000 or early 2000.
Most of what I write, I just keep to myself. I have a lot of writings, songs and poems to share.
So, as I return from life’s road and seasons have been my teacher, I return with poetry, Poetrimony. I have many, many stories to share behind these poems. But I tend only to write about them when I feel in my spirit that I want to write and post them. I feel that way today.
What I did below pick out some poems. They’re all random. There’s no hidden meaning or agenda. I won’t have the dates. So, you won’t know exactly what was going on at that time. But I will give you a little glimpse into what occurred that motivated each poem. I return with Poetrimony. Poetrimony kind of hard to say. Poetrimony is part poem, part testimony, part spirit, part life.
It embodies my journey on life’s road. It embodies Seasons As My Teacher.
Years ago, I was asked by a customer at Whole Foods Market what type of meditation do I do, after she shared with me that she meditates. I used to meet a lot of customers who meditate at Whole Foods. That’s because there is an obvious correlation between being healthy and being holy.
I am always challenged when I am asked how I meditate. Most people who ask this, have been professionally trained or studied a particular method on their own, and can quickly provide their type. I can’t. I guess I could say mindfulness. I can’t be specific namely, because my method is a hybrid form of meditation that evolved organically for me, beginning over 30 years ago.
Though I meditate, it is very rare that I would meditate, and not pray also. They go hand and hand for me. There is one exception, one which I experience when I receive acupuncture. I practice meditation when I receive Acupuncture, but I do not pray in this meditation. In this meditation, I don’t recite an affirmation or say anything. I simply visualize until my senses go beyond the needles, moxibustion, and even an itch. …or an urge to pee.