I’m going to make this clear right here and right now. I don’t think that I am perfect.
“They Smile In Your Face, Always Trying To Take Your Place….The Backstabbers.” – The Ojays
It is my imperfection that fuels my desire to become a better man. My reflections reveal my faults, just as fairly as it reveals that of others.
I cannot Trust a person after they have burned or backstabbed me!
Not only can I not, but I also don’t have a desire to Trust a betrayer ever again.
I feel that I would be a damned fool to allow someone to burn me, then burn me again.
Ironically, it seems that I have no control over this feeling. In my spirit, mind, and soul, there is no desire to trust them again. Those pillars of my being feel so passionately against Trust again, that it drains me to the point that I can’t even take the first step towards doing so.
I can conquer Anger and even Forgiveness, but I cannot Trust a backstabber again. Maybe I can conquer the mountains of Anger and Forgiveness because they help me to heal me.
But Trusting someone who has already proven to be dishonest would keep me on edge every time that I engaged with them.
I usually limit my dealings with them because it’s hard to believe the things they say. In the cases, where I attempted to continue relations, I listened to their assertions but silently did not believe them.
I am not sure that there is anything that I must do to heal this sentiment about some people. The spiritual verdict is not yet out on whether God wants me to.
I would imagine that God wants me to continue to Love and Trust in general. But me being analytical longs to know if I am to specifically Trust my betrayers again.
God, is potentially repeating the same mistake a ‘shame on me’ moment, or is it admirable in your sight?
The answer, I just don’t know. I clearly feel like they’ve had their chance with me, and blew it. But is that good spiritual thinking? I just don’t know.
So, I’ll accept that I just can’t Trust deceivers, thieves, and betrayers for now, until I find out what God desires of me.
…How about you? I am curious for my own sake of understanding.
Kevy
Poems
Trust You
By Kevy Michaels
I conquered the eye of the storm of
Resentment
I was nearly swallowed by rip current
But I swam to shore safely
And was eager to take on new adventures
I walked through the Fires of
Anger
I suffered third-degree burns over my entire body
Ointments, Love, and God healed me quickly
Today, the scars are barely noticeable
By foot, I set out to complete a trek across the Gobi desert
To Achieve…
…Forgiveness
The hot sands blistered my feet so badly
That I had to retreat
I am determined to get there, someday
But, I cannot make it to the other side of the mountain of
Trust
Every time I’m near that mountain my body gets weak
My spirit deflates, and my soul won’t let me move
I have come to reconcile that
I have no interest in taking on this adventure
…I cannot
I’m assuming that God wants me to Trust you
…Again
He clearly wants me to Love you
But, he also wants me to be Wise
It wouldn’t be wise repeating the same mistakes again
So, I accept that I don’t care to
Trust you, any more
Though I do wish to Forgive you
I can never
Trust you
I am sorry that I allowed
You to cause me to feel this way
To You
By Kevy Michaels
To You
I was Loyalty
You could count on me
The way that an infant is certain
Of its mother’s nourishment and love
To You
I was True
My honesty was unblemished
I shared my Soul with You
Just as I did with our God
To You
I was Trusting
I never doubted your Love for me
I never entertained the Thought
That you may have felt Differently
But Then
You
Hurt
Me
You
Betrayed
Me
It could be that You
Just didn’t
Understand
Me
Or
Maybe
Weren’t
Worthy of
Me
And now I find
That with all my might
I can’t Bring Us Back
To where we used to be
I love You
But can’t seem to Bridge
The Divide
That Separates
You
From
Me
We can never
Be
As
One
Again
Articles
As you know, I love to research every topic on which I post. I have researched Trusting someone who has betrayed you. Here’s what I found.
How To Trust Someone Again After They’ve Betrayed You & Broken Your Heart – Susan Saint-Welch – Expert – August 17, 2018
- It’s not easy.
- Your trust must be rebuilt and earned through consistency
- You must take responsibility to ask for what you need from him in order for this relationship to heal and move forward.
- You must be willing to forgive.
- You must set new boundaries.
- If possible, seek professional guidance.
When You Have Been Betrayed – by Monica A. Frank, Ph.D. – Excel At Life
What is a betrayal?
Betrayal is probably the most devastating loss a person can experience. To be betrayed, the person must first experience trust in the betrayer. It is fairly impossible for you to be betrayed if you did not trust the individual in the first place. Therefore, the definition of betrayal involves the act of someone violating your trust in them. The betrayal I am discussing in this article refers to a variety of forms of betrayal. For instance, a child is betrayed when he or she is abused by the parents who are supposed to love, support, and protect the child. A spouse is betrayed when their partner has an affair. Betrayal is when someone you trust lies to you, cheats on you, abuses you, or hurts you by putting
When should you forgive a betrayal?
Many people ask how to know whether or not to forgive and continue with the relationship. I can give you some of the questions to consider for this issue but I can’t give the answers because each person needs to determine for him or herself what is right.
1) Does the person recognize the hurt they have caused and are trying to change the behavior?
2) Does the individual want forgiveness?
3) Did the person regret acting so rashly? Did they learn from this behavior and are unlikely to do it again?
4) How long have you known the person? Is this typical behavior or is a single instance?
5) Have you talked with the person and they have accepted responsibility?
6) Was the behavior intentional?
7) What makes this relationship worth the forgiveness?
8) Do you need to forgive so as to move on in your life without the bitterness? However, this doesn’t mean you have to continue the relationship.
Bible Verses
Matthew 5:10-12 – “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
Psalm 41:9 – “Yea, mine own familiar friend, in whom I trusted, which did eat of my bread, hath lifted up his heel against me.”
Psalm 55:12-14 – “12 For it was not an enemy that reproached me; then I could have borne it: neither was it he that hated me that did magnify himself against me; then I would have hid myself from him: 13 But it was thou, a man mine equal, [1] my guide, and mine acquaintance. 14 We took sweet counsel together, and walked unto the house of God in company.”
Matthew 19:26 – “But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.”
Job 19:13-14 – “13 He hath put my brethren far from me, and mine acquaintance are verily estranged from me. 14 My kinsfolk have failed, and my familiar friends have forgotten me.”
Matthew 26:48-50 – “46 Rise, let us be going: behold, he is at hand that doth betray me. 47 And while he yet spake, lo, Judas, one of the twelve, came, and with him a great multitude with swords and staves, from the chief priests and elders of the people. 48 Now he that betrayed him gave them a sign, saying, Whomsoever I shall kiss, that same is he: hold him fast. 49 And forthwith he came to Jesus, and said, Hail, master; and kissed him. 50 And Jesus said unto him, Friend, wherefore art thou come? Then came they, and laid hands on Jesus and took him.”
1 Peter 2:23 – “Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously:”
Matthew 24:9-10 – “Then shall they deliver you up to be afflicted, and shall kill you: and ye shall be hated of all nations for my name’s sake.”
Videos
How to Deal With Betrayal of Trust – Jocko Willink – 33,050 views – Jocko Podcast – Published on Jan 9, 2017
Excerpt from JOCKO PODCAST 23. Join the conversation on Twitter: @jockowillink @echocharles
How to trust people again after you have been betrayed – 21,181 views – Marie Dubuque – Published on Jan 7, 2011
Say you have just been burned in a relationship or friendship. People say to “just get back up on the horse again.” That is not so easy. Learn from the experience and become very picky about future friends or boyfriends/girlfriends. People are choosier about their cars than their friends! Surround yourself with people who you know will have your back. And don’t share personal information with anyone too soon.
Can You Ever Really Trust A Liar or Cheater? – 139,985 views – Coach Corey Wayne – Published on Nov 16, 2013
Devious and dishonest people tend to deceive out of their desire to not hurt other people’s feelings, get what they want or to avoid dealing with the truth or the consequences of their actions. How you should approach relationships with other people who are known to be devious, lie or cheat on their significant others.
Abraham Hicks ~ When you encounter deception – 79,007 views – zmahoon – Published on Apr 8, 2013
When you feel deceived by someone, it is not your intuition sending you a warning – it is your inner being disagreeing with your opinion – your inner being never sees anyone as less than. Beautiful workshop open – I will post the next part with the same icon. For more information on the teachings of Abraham please visit http://www.abraham-hicks.com. For a discussion on the law of attraction please visit http://www.zmahoon.weebly.com
Note: You may use Google Translate to copy and paste, then translate any posts on this website, to over 60 different languages.
Being cognizant of international visitors, I want to do all that I can to communicate wisdom globally for all.
What makes it so challenging to trust someone who have betrayed you, is that Trust is a prerequisite to betrayal. You’ve already trusted them.
One can only be deceived, if they first Trusted the betrayer.
The problem that I have with people who propagate Trusting, is that they present it as a immediate virtue. It is not.
Like Foregiveness, it is an evolutionary process.
Since we never really completely reach the destiny of Trust and Forgiveness, we are constantly incentivized to achieve it, as our spiritual awarenesss expands.
luv
kevy
LikeLike